Child Services and the Kidnapping

         My 1st and only child services case

After Charlie made the abuse allegations in the paperwork I sarcastically said "what's next, are you going to call child services on me?" Well wouldn't you know that within a week of me saying that, child services called me and came to my home. As a parent I am actually really grateful that they took the accusations seriously. They don't know me, or my family, so it was comforting to know that they take the time to check into these types of allegations. The frustrating part was knowing how this was effecting Cindy and that they were wasting their time and resources on a fake call.

          The case worker asked me and my mother some questions. We were both honest about her being allowed to spank Cindy. Then they privately asked Cindy some more questions.  Within a few days the case was closed and they determined that the call was made as a form of retaliation.  That is apparently and unfortunately, quit common. How is this not illegal!? Once they investigate and determine the call was made on bad merit, there should be some form of reprocussion or this will continue to be a tactic that angry and manipulative parents use.

                      The kidnapping

Apparently it made Charlie extremely mad that his lastest sceme didn't turn out the way he planned. So he moved on to "bigger and better" tactics to try to get me to drop the case.

At first he would keep Cindy just a few days past the pre scheduled time, 1 of those times she missed her own birthday party!  This was becoming just a big game to him. How bad could he hurt me before I'd give in. He clearly had no reguard for how this was effecting Cindy.  She was so sad and confused by everything going on. I tried my best to comfort her by telling her that daddy and I were making some adjustments to the schedule so she might have a different routine for a little while.

Finally he realized I was not going to give in. (Not because I was playing his game, but because I knew that what I was doing would ultimately be for her safety and well-being).  That's when he decided not to bring her back at all!

Every few days he had a new reason.  The abuse allegations (which were proven false), the way my husband supposedly treated her, then finally he said he was concerned that I was doing drugs around her! He even took her to a doctor to get a drug test done. Looking back I know why he did it. He was making sure nothing got into her system when he had smoked weed around her.

This was one of the very toughest things I have ever gone through! I tried everything to get her back. Of course I called the police (but they couldn't take her back because we currently had no court orders in place yet). The only thing they could do was preform a well check every few days. As long as she looked healthy, there was food in the cupboards, and no outright signs of drug use or abuse..they couldn't do a damn thing!

Then I decided to try to take her out of school, because once she was back home then he couldn't take her back from me. But he was already 5 steps ahead of me. He had told her school that he was suspicious of abuse in the home and that he wanted to sit in her class all day everyday. They let him, which meant since she was already in the custody of one parent the other one couldn't take her..without consent.

Those 23 days were seriously a living hell! He let her call me only twice, and both times she begged me to come get her! I of course didn't want to scare her any more than she already was, so I would say something like " I know honey I miss you too, you'll be home soon I'm just not sure exactly when." Among other things to try to make light of the situation and not give her more cause for concern. You will never understand how hard that was to do, unless you have been there. I wanted to scream "I'm trying baby, I'm doing my very best to get you home safe, just try to make this easier on yourself and Don't tell Daddy you miss me or want to come home!"

I'm crying even as I write this because I still can't imagine what was going on inside her mind, or what he was telling her. Possibly that mommy doesn't want you to come home? Or you're going to stay here forever?

During this time I was also writing up and filing my motion to oppose his request for temporary orders, and my own temporary orders. (I wasn't sure which one was required so I did both.)

Finally 3 days before our first hearing he let her come home. Probably because he realized his kidnapping might not go over well with the courts.

I found out from Cindy that Charlie and Amy were fighting almost constantly in the last 2 weeks that Cindy was there. Maybe that's why he let her come home also? I don't know.

I know 23 days doesn't seem like a long time but it is when you don't have your child and you're worried sick about them!

My other daughter was a mess without her big sissy. She asked about her everyday! I took a picture of the moment they saw eachother after that time apart and it is the most beautiful picture I have of my girls. They have the biggest smiles on their faces as they stare at each other for what seemed like forever.

In the next post I'll explain what I stated in my opposing and personal temp orders.